Looking back through wisdom gained
QUESTION: Masters, I’m confused by my choices over the past 58 years. In my 20’s I seriously pursued an acting/singing career and loved it. Then, I made a deathbed promise to the mother of a narcissistic sociopath, married him, abandoned my career, allowed myself to be abused/controlled until I finally left that marriage. I never wanted children, yet I had a miscarriage, stillborn and two children. After divorce, I started a business, and then 5 cancers and 2 accidents shifted my direction again. Recently, I remarried, moved to New Zealand and have complete freedom. Were these incredibly divergent paths my original plan for this lifetime? Was making choices I absolutely knew didn’t feel right and then living out the difficult consequences one of my important lessons? I’ve often wondered if I would have learned my most important soul lessons through an acting career. What’s important for me to learn now moving forward? ~Mary Anne, New Zealand
ANSWER: As you may have guessed from what you put yourself through, you are a very old soul who wished for a divergent and difficult lifetime. If you look back on each thing that happened to you, it is now possible to see how you have learned from each step and been able to move on to the point you inhabit at this time. You are in a place of knowing who you are and have identified all of the strengths a soul may exhibit within a human body.
You first dealt with feeling an obligation to others and that they were more important than you – to the extent of giving up your dreams and future to placate another. Gathering self-confidence and self-worth, you moved on to taking responsibility for yourself and your life with the realization that each soul is on a solo journey through the human existence.
You do have a very strong intuition, but as you say, you didn’t always listen to it. You can go back and see where it would have led to different results. Your business was the point where you started trusting that you can manifest things you desire – when you have the time and lack of interference to do so. The physical roadblocks gave you time to analyze how strong you were, how much you wanted to be in charge, and how the only thing that was really important was the moment and what you did with it.
You never truly gave up acting. Through all the trials and tribulations, you have shown those around you how to live life with dignity and a sharing heart when there seemed to be nothing worth going on for.
In your future, live each day to the fullest, choosing what makes you happy. Share your fantastic spirit with family and friends, and show everyone how older souls never let their humanity get in the way of their spiritual journey for wisdom.