Even adults shun responsibility
QUESTION: Masters three years ago I had a promising career but very toxic. I wanted to escape that life. I met a new love and decided to go back to my country and drop everything. Gradually, I became financially dependent of my wife. She is educated, successful, simple but fluctuates a lot her humor. Currently she says that I’m too passive and lazy, by not getting the expected results. She sent me away repeatedly. I went, but I came back. I really want to be independent, but things are not going very well. On the other hand, I seek my spiritual ascent, forbidden
subject in our house. This offends her intelligence, deeply. I am grateful for everything I have or what I am. I do not know if I should stay or go, I am very insecure and have doubts about what I should do. ~Luis, Brazil
ANSWER: During this spiritual journey you have chosen, you are making it as easy on yourself as possible by relying on the goodness of others to provide for your needs. This is selfish and not very transcendent. You have become lazy about taking responsibility for your personal needs. You are depending on your wife to feed and clothe you while you spend time on your “studies.”
You are like a sticky seed pod that catches on your clothes, annoys you, and becomes more firmly embedded the more you shake to get rid of it. You see having your wife take care of you as a matter of right since she is married to you. Life does not work that way; ascension does not work that way.
You have to work to achieve enlightenment. It does not come from wishing but rather from work. One of the requirements is learning your chosen life lessons by making a choice between the various options. You must do this – not ride on the back of another.
You don’t want to be responsible for the results of your choices so you make none. It is time to decide what it is you really want because right now you have no idea. Stop being childish and running from your obligations; start things off by choosing a direction for your learning. The doubts and the fears in your life are indications that a lesson is behind each. Work on resolving them and you will grow.