Time to choose
QUESTION: Masters, I feel like I’m stuck in this situation. I have a strong connection with a man that I’m told is my soul mate. I try to stop thinking about him but it is really hard to forget him. I am married, but I feel that I have stronger connection with this man I met some months ago. I feel like my love to my husband is more like compassion and to this other man it is burning and intense, with this deeper connection. I have heard my husband might not have been faithful to me – but he won’t confess anything. Today he is all the time telling how much he loves me and how beautiful I am. At the moment I really can’t find strong feelings like that towards him. Am I only making excuses to continue dreaming of that other man? Who is telling me the truth? ~NP, Finland
ANSWER: Souls come to Earth to have human experiences. One of those physical experiments is concerned with interpersonal relationships between men and women. Society has certain rules and regulations which they insist all should follow. Marriage is forever, couples should be monogamous: these are not spiritual restrictions.
You have been taught that it is wrong to love someone other than the person to whom you are married. Why? You have love also for family, children, your best friends, so why is it different? Most will say because it could involve sexual relations. These thoughts were not always observed. There was a time, when war seemed imminent, that the cry was for free love so that all might experience the bliss available. But we digress slightly from your problem.
Your husband still loves you but you don’t feel the same about him because you have grown at different rates. He is still at the level of when you met; you have become more aware of yourself and your life lessons. His type of love is one of convenience; your reciprocation is one of compassion. The excitement is gone. He has a lot of things outside the marriage to occupy him that he does not share with you; you need stimulation.
The intense feelings you got from the stranger come from someone with whom you have spent other lives. It is not merely a sign that you might be happy together; it occurred so that you would be awakened to your situation with your husband. It is also to let you know you have freedom of choice and nothing is written in stone. Go into your feelings and see where you want to be in a year or so. Ask if there is a future in your heart with your husband. Just stop using dreams about a stranger as an excuse for not facing your problems.