Meeting your expectations
QUESTION: Masters, I want to find a place to work where it feels safe to belong and where I can shine while exploring and expressing myself in something that will bring healing and understanding while shedding light upon things that are in the dark. I wish to find joy in my own creativity without being overpowered by fear of being on my own. I fear disappearing, being meaningless or arrogant and unlovable and detached from others. I feel all these things right now. I am afraid not to achieve, resulting in wasting my life and disappearing in chaos. I feel I have been unable to achieve anything personally or professionally. My question would be how to overcome these barriers within myself. Some of them feel like very old patterns from other lifetimes. ~Nina, Norway
ANSWER: You crave recognition and reward for doing your life’s work. That means you are not satisfied with who you are and need to get love from outside of you because you don’t love yourself. Every characteristic that you seek for yourself is a judgment of ego-based factors. It is saying you are not magnificent or sufficient as a soul and must be accepted in the human world to feel complete.
How can any life experience chosen by an immortal soul ever be meaningless? To exist is to achieve something through the use of your intention, so you could never have a moment that was lived disappear from memory. Every day you spend interacting with the world is achieving knowledge for you and the universe.
Your desire is not to take the time to feel what is right for you but to be protected, guarded, and guided into “doing the right thing” by the opinions of others. What you are doing is perfectly all right because nothing is right or wrong. The fear you have is responsibility for making your own decisions. This is a huge barrier to climb over and it is old. You have frequently chosen to be controlled by the whim of those around you. It felt safe, because if others made all the decisions, you could never be wrong.
Find your power. Honor your soul and take charge of your life. You have freedom of choice to do whatever you want to experience. Start looking at the world without looking through someone else.